Gentle Sleep Training, Sleep Coaching, Sleep Guidance, Sleep Shaping...Which is it, and What's the Difference?

Sleep "training" has a stigma associated with it for obvious reasons. It sounds like training your dog, it seems rigid, and parents often assume that sleep training means "shut the door, and cry it out." This is not what I do. There are many different approaches to sleep "training," and I prefer to call my work "sleep coaching" or "sleep guidance" with support...lots and lots of customized support. Together, we're shaping healthy, independent sleep habits that will lead to babies, toddlers, and big kids who are secure and content in their sleep environment and have the skills they need to happily stay in their crib or bed all night long, even when they have overnight wake-ups. Setting the foundation for healthy, independent sleep is not something you're doing to your child; you're doing this for your child ( and for yourself too).

Imagine laying your tired but happy baby down in the crib (or toddler/big kid in bed) at 6:30 or 7:00pm and closing the door. You head back to the kitchen to clean up dinner while listening to a show or podcast, or to the couch to fold laundry while watching a show with your spouse (maybe have a drink if that's your thing). Or maybe you squeeze in a quick workout or a much needed shower - whatever self-care looks like for you. All the while, you watch and hear your child on the monitor, cooing/chatting/singing or just snuggling a lovey if old enough, and drifting off to sleep within 15 minutes.

Then, you don't go back in their room until 6:30 or 7:00am, when you eagerly walk in to find a well-rested baby or toddler who is excited to see you and wake up for the day. What does that feel like? It feels ________ ! (Fill in the blank.) You've both gotten the rest you need to feel reenergized and ready for whatever a new day holds.

Did your child wake up overnight? Probably, yes. Did you wake up overnight? Definitely, yes...because we're all human, and our brains and bodies are still working overnight. Same with babies, toddlers, and big kids; we all stir or wake during the night. As adults, we've learned how to get ourselves back to sleep. What about our kids? If we've successfully instilled healthy, independent sleep habits, our children feel secure and content enough in their own sleep environment that they do not need us to help them go back to sleep when they wake. They will still have overnight wake-ups, especially as babies when they are going through developmental changes and conquering new milestones; it's totally normal and inevitable. But they are perfectly capable of happily hanging out in their crib or bed while they self-soothe, play, sing, or chat their way back to sleep, on their own. We just need to give them the tools and space to do this. Our kids are so capable of achieving restful sleep, and we're capable of letting them.

With the customized support I'll provide as we walk together through this sleep guidance process, just remember, we're doing this for your child, not to your child. When everyone is well-rested, the whole family benefits and thrives. Keep picturing what that will look like in your household. Together, we can make it happen, and it doesn't matter what we call it...training, guidance, shaping, support. All that matters is successful sleep for everyone. Restful sleep directly impacts overall health.